Emotional Balance 


The missing experience for many of us is being heard and seen. We may feel invisible, we may not feel that we have the right to be alive. This leads to unbearable loneliness and shame that may lead to shutting off our emotions or controlling ourselves so that our overwhelming emotions don't come out to others who may see us as "too much".​​

Controlling emotions this way leads to it's own pain and suffering. When we cut ourselves off from ourselves we feel even more alone, even more hopeless.

When we work with emotion in sessions we stay with the pain, the anger, the sadness, the discomfort. We allow space, together, for the emotions to be seen, felt, and expressed. For many, being with their own emotions may be new. For many, allowing another to witness their emotions may be new. But these are the missing experiences that we have been longing for. These are the experiences that transform our old patterns.
When we bring our awareness to our pain, we connect with more of ourselves than we knew before, and through that connection, we realize that we ARE more than we knew before.  That child part that's screaming to be heard can calm down because it has been heard, which allows our nervous system to calm and lowers anxiety. 

This allows for a new way of moving through pain, a path of ease.  What was anger becomes strength.  What was hopelessness becomes choice.  What was uncomfortable becomes capacity.  From this awareness comes a different perspective on what had been painful, overwhelming, or traumatic.  From this awareness, new choices and experiences are available.  ​​

Relationships

When controlling our emotions is important, we are not able to pick and choose which emotions we will control. So as we limit pain, anger and sadness, happiness and joy are similarly limited. We may then find that relationships feel empty and unsatisfying. 

When our emotions feel out of control, we may not express them to others which leads to a lack of personal satisfaction and a lack of intimacy with others.

When we regain our ability to feel our full range of emotions we are able to connect with others in a new and more fulfilling way, from a place of wholeness and safety. We no longer need the other person to feel ourselves. From this place of wholeness and connection with ourselves we can meet others and have a true relationship.